Let’s say – and this strictly hypothetical here, so please don’t get offended – that you’re a Sandy Hook denier, also known as a Sandy Hook hoaxer. Maybe you’re a lifelong conspiracy crank looking for your next hustle, or maybe you just don’t want to believe what took place that day actually happened (which is, in a way, perfectly understandable), but you’re having a very difficult time coming up for an alternate explanation for something so many people experienced firsthand and so many more saw play out in the media. And while it barely makes any sense whatsoever, the story you ultimately bet the farm on involves Mossad death squads a FEMA “Active Shooter” drill taking place at an abandoned school. But there’s a problem: there isn’t really any evidence that supports your claim. Not only does FEMA not host “Active Shooter” drills (let alone at abandoned schools), but this imaginary drill does not appear anywhere on their calendar. So what do you do? You fake it. It’s so easy, a Florida scumbag could do it!
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Professional crank James Fetzer and his band of loopy dipshits put a lot of stock in Twitter updates (or “tweets”, as the kids call them), citing them as evidence a handful of times throughout the despicable “Nobody Died At Sandy Hook”. In fact, in Chapter Five, Vivian Lee considers a handful of confusingly time-stamped tweets (the product of a well-known Twitter “bug”, as discussed in Chapter Five, Part One) to be one of the “top ten reasons Sandy Hook was an elaborate hoax”. On page 67, under “4. There was foreknowledge of the event”, she writes:

In addition, tweets about the shooting began before it occurred, a tribute was apparently uploaded one month before the event, and web pages honoring the victims, including a Facebook page R.I.P. Victoria Soto, were established before they had “officially” died.

Much has also been made of a single seemingly innocuous tweet originating from Sandy Hook Elementary School principal Dawn Hochsprung’s Twitter account, posted on October 17th, 2012, showing the school’s students participating in their annual evacuation drill. Despite not looking anything at all like the chaos that unfolded less than two months later (which should come to an enormous shock to no one, ever), this is somehow supposed to be proof that what occurred on December 14th, 2012, was actually just a drill:

Of course this would not be at all noteworthy if the authors had any doubts whatsoever regarding the legitimacy of the account, just as tweets from the morning of the 14th could not possibly be considered one of the “top ten reasons Sandy Hook was an elaborate hoax” unless they also had total faith in the site’s ability to accurately time-stamp its user-generated content. With this in mind, Fetzer and his “expert researchers” logically have no choice but to accept the fact that all of the the photographs shared by Dawn Hochsprung on Twitter between September and December of 2012 must also be genuine. As these photos depict a busy and bustling elementary school, this would obviously deal a devastating blow to Fetzer’s absurd claim that Sandy Hook had been closed and unoccupied since 2008; an idea which acts as the foundation for his entire theory (and, as such, this book). So it shouldn’t come as much as a surprise to anyone who understands how these hucksters work that the book make no mention of Dawn’s timeline outside of the evacuation photo and, in their attempt to hide it from their readers, even cite their own blog entries about the evacuation photo in the footnotes rather instead the actual source. An example, from page 96:

Why wouldn’t they provide the URL to the photo on Dawn’s timeline as their source? What is it they don’t want their readers to see?
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“Nobody Died At Sandy Hook”
Chapter Eleven
By: James Fetzer and Kelley Watt

When I saw that the title of this chapter was “Are Sandy Hook skeptics delusional with ‘twisted minds’?”, I thought “Great! This will be the easiest chapter yet! I’ll answer ‘yes’ – or ‘yes, of course’ if I’m feeling particularly chatty – publish, and move on!” But it turns out that there are actual claims being made here and while the majority of them are rehashed from earlier chapters, a couple of new ones rear their ugly head… heads?
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“Nobody Died At Sandy Hook”
Chapter Ten
By: “Dr. Eowyn” (Maria Hsia Chang) and James Fetzer

Chapter Ten is an interesting one; not because it finally, miraculously offers up even a sliver of compelling information (it doesn’t, not that there was ever such a possibility), but because its content was very thoroughly debunked long, long ago (by Metabunk, by Snopes, by USA Today, etc). And while the same could be said for nearly every other chapter in this completely asinine book, this time the authors openly acknowledge it. And they do so within the very first paragraph! But somehow the chapter doesn’t abruptly end there. Instead, James Fetzer and Maria Chang awkwardly fumble their way through a counterargument that basically boils down to “nuh-uh”.
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As demonstrated in parts one, two, and three, there is plenty of evidence that Sandy Hook Elementary was open and fully operational when Adam Lanza (and Adam Lanza alone) shot his way into the school and murdered twenty-six people. Since I’m limiting myself to the same exact collection of crime scene photos used by deniers to argue that the school closed permanently in 2008 in order to prepare for a fake shooting spree four years later, I haven’t even touched the mountain of official documents uncovered by the researchers over at Metabunk, Sandy Hook: Focus On Facts, and more.

This time I’m going to talk a bit about the SMART Technologies products found within Sandy Hook Elementary. While SMART Tables and Boards can be found in multiple classrooms as well as the library (as seen in the video walk-through and briefly discussed in Chapter Eight, Part Two), I’m going to limit the discussion to those seen in classrooms six (special education) and eight (1st grade).
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Is there a more exciting subject than trees? I submit that there is not.

Throughout Chapter 8 of “Nobody Died At Sandy Hook”, expert in absolutely nothing whatsoever Alan Powell leans heavily on the premise that the crime scene photos taken both inside and outside of Sandy Hook Elementary School were actually taken sometime in the fall; “late October or early November” is his estimate. “Dr. Eowyn” (aka Maria Hsia) also posits this asinine theory in the similarly ridiculous Chapter 2, “Six Signs Sandy Hook Elementary School Was Closed”.
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Or “James Fetzer And The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Ask Me Anything”

For the uninitiated, Reddit is a user-driven content aggregator, broken up into what is referred to as “subreddits”. These subreddits are organized by area of interest and truly run the gamut, covering news, politics, culture, and absolutely everything in between. Seriously, there are thousands of them. And based on the number of total subscribers, the conspiracy subreddit is currently ranked the 108th most popular on the site (nestled comfortably between the NBA and anime). Sandy Hook denial is unfortunately yet predictably a popular subject there, so even a clueless doofus like James Fetzer manages to receive regular praise (as well as occasional scorn as conspiracy theorists love to eat their own almost as much as they love conspiracies).

While it struggled to find an audience, the “conspiracyAMA” – or conspiracy “ask me anything” – subreddit was created as a way to take the incredibly popular “ask me anything” format regularly utilized by celebrities and other public figures looking to interact with Reddit’s enormous userbase and make it a safe space for conspiracy folk. And while it ultimately paled in comparison to its inspiration, it did play host to one of the most disastrous AMAs I’ve seen this side of Woody Harrelson. The guest of honor was — you guessed it — bloated clown James Fetzer, there to take full advantage of the fifteen minutes allotted to him by his then-recent Amazon ban.

I really recommend that you mark out some time and attempt to read this beast in its entirety (it eventually grew to 371 comments before running out of steam) as it’s pretty amazing, but I’m going to touch on some of my favorite moments, full of Fetzer’s baldfaced lies, furious backpedaling, and even his predictably asinine thoughts on other topics (but especially Jews). All answers are given by James Fetzer, transcribed by the moderator. It may not mean much to you if you’re unfamiliar with the site, but it’s worth noting that Fetzer’s answers were rated so poorly by the audience that many of them are hidden from view. That’s how badly things went for poor James… in his own AMA! But don’t feel too bad for the guy; he seems to think it went swimmingly. Seriously! Just look at this Facebook post!

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